Episode blurb Edit

In this episode we discuss the most depressing television shows in history, Tom's potential untimely demise in London, a cereal box that angered Tim and answer some listener mail. Also, some stuff about breakfast.[1]

Running Gags Edit

Quotes Edit

Tom: "If someone's wearing a tuxedo with a baseball cap, they're either bald or [have] horns or something."


Tim: "Tom, how did the meet-up go? In London, England?"

Tom: "Uneventful. Indeterminable. I don't remember!"


Tim: "Tom, you can't call the Royal Family 'malarkey' when over there. They'll throw you in jail."


Tim: "Hello, everybody."

[sound of something dropping]

Tim: "Tom."

Tom: "Sorry!"

Tim: "I asked you to keep quiet! I received some very distressing news this morning. Apparently at the meet-up that occurred 2 days ago, Tom was stabbed to death. Stop laughing, Tom, it's gonna happen!"

Tom: "No, it's not gonna happen!"

Tim: "I have to record the news of your death while I can. Tom, shut up! It's with a heavy heart that I report that Tom was stabbed to death in London, England. Fear not ... I have a bunch of other, superior hosts lined up to take his place."


Tom: "I have a personality that lends itself to being stabbed?"

Tim: "People HATE you."


Tom: "That's a true story. A man farted in my cereal."

Tim: "See, that's a gem. This is better than the Internet episode already."


Tim: "You're always saying, 'Tim, I look to you for all the ideas, you're the ideas man that drives The Complete Guide to Everything.' "

Tom: "That sounds like me."


Tom: "I can't believe that we are giving away for free a show where a man reads a cereal box to another man."


Tom: "This isn't really 'Tim and Tom Solve Your Problems', it's more 'Tim and Tom Read An Email'."

Tim: "'Tom Reads An Email While Tim Plays Scrabble On His Phone'."




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